Somebody kick me into gear!

As I mentioned in my last post, physically I feel terrible.

• I’ve dropped my oral birth control
• Emotions are across-the-board-crazy
• Bloating
• Eating poorly
• Not exercising
• Not getting enough sleep
• Gaining weight

I’ve been diagnosed with a prolapse, which is causing all bits of discomfort – but which cannot be repaired by means other than kegel exercises until I’m done having kids because it’s not “severe” and having children will reverse any repairs done.

I’m trying to find that “oomph”, that push, that drive, that I had last year – but I’m still looking. I’m hoping with the weather turning it’ll soon get easier. Funny, that. I was sure once the weather got cooler I’d be all over regular exercise – when in fact I find I HATE exercising when it’s cold and gray. Need to get back to eating healthy, and exercising during my lunch. What’s sad is that when I’m exercising, I’m not reading as much I do most of my reading during my lunch time so I have to pick one over the other…

Game plan is to get back on track – diet wise. I need to start eating the right stuff more often. I find I’m hungry ALL the time and yet still tired and without energy after eating. Not good. Need to get back to eating a good serving of protein and fiber at every meal. With a better diet, I know the rest will fall into place.

I found this interesting simulator that will predict, based on a reduced calorie diet and exercise plan, how long it’ll take to lose a specific amount of weight. This is not a “new” idea or anything, but the simulator is tremendously customizable and provides an abundant amount of information. I was able to tweak it according to what I wanted to change – and I did a bit of give and take to make it realistic. It says that at my current weight I can reach my goal in six months by walking on my two work breaks, jogging during my lunch, and eating a little more than 1400 calories a day – seems do-able. However, even though it assumes your body fat percentage and predicts it in the future, due to the fact that it doesn’t have any specific inputs for diet (how much of each caloric type you’re consuming,) you cannot tweak the diet to work on your body fat percentage.

8 Hours a Night

Yesterday I started a more deliberate diet and exercise program. Food wise, I was satisfied - though I really need to drink more water. Exercise wise, I did okay. Spent about 30 minutes on a stair stepper in my work’s gym. I’d never used a stair stepper before, but given my lower body bulk (I’m 5′ 1″, 165 lbs – size 14/16 on my lower half size M/10 on my top half) I figure it would be the best group of muscles to start on.

The machine started at level 5, but I thought I needed to set it lower because it was taking all of my strength to push down on the steps to get them to lower at any reasonable speed to get my heart pumping. Whenever I envisioned a stair stepper, I thought you were supposed to be quickly climbing these imaginary stairs – but I was moving so slow it was as though I were climbing a ladder. I looked all over the machine to see if I could find some set of instructions on how to set the level, but the the instructions were very basic and simply said to “increase level as needed”. Halfway through my workout I had the brilliant idea to set the level higher, closer to 10, and suddenly I was getting the workout I was looking for. Ends up I was fighting the steps that were trying to support me as I worked out, not act as a resistance.

Got home last night exhausted. I’m not surprised, since I only got about 4 hours of sleep the night before, but it was still disappointing to fall asleep at 8pm and wake up this morning at 4:15am – still tired. I haven’t been sleeping enough as it is, supplementing sleep with caffeine and food, so I’m hoping that catching up will not make me so tired every night. Either that, or resort to more caffeine!

The Game Plan

Yesterday I had quite the meltdown in regards to health, exercise & grocery shopping.

As you may or may not know, I’ve been battling with getting back “on the wagon” in regards to healthy eating and exercise. I became really disillusioned after my lack of result with ChaLEAN Extreme (which I loved, I just didn’t love working so hard for such little results) and haven’t found a program since. Luckily I haven’t gained any weight since I lost – so I think that’s a good indicator that my diet really isn’t the thing holding me back any longer.

On top of that, I’m getting conflicting information from all angles. One minute I’m eating too many calories, the next minute I’m not eating enough. I need to do cardio. I need to do weight training. I need to not exercise and just diet for awhile. Etc, etc, etc.

Tack that onto the fact that we’re trying desperately to budget our money better and I simply can’t follow some special “only for me” meal plan because that equates to a double grocery bill that’s out of reach and three sets of cooking individuals in one house.

Needless to say, it’s been a struggle.

I need help. I need a game plan. I think I’ve got it though!

First: I’m going to get back onto a cardio plan and forgo the weight training to see if I get better results. I didn’t care for Jillian’s 30 Day Shred (it was boring, and I was developing a lot of pain) so I’m going to try for another suggested trainer: Denise Austin. I bought one of her cardio DVDs at an awesome price and I’m pinning my hopes that it wont be as boring or pain inducing as Jillian. I know that they’ll come a point where I’ll plateau - and when that happens I’m going to pick up ChaLEAN Extreme again.

Second: My husband and I went to B&N and found a cookbook that was full of healthy, simple, supposedly budget friendly recipes. It also has a lot of great tips for eating healthy in general, and my husband is confident he can do the cooking which is one of the most important things (I get home too late, I’m too tired, and I need help). I know that some of you sent me recipes and suggested books, and generally were amazingly supportive and helpful – I can’t thank you enough!

Third: I’m going to mark my calories needs at my weight multiplied by seven, and then I’m going to halve whatever calories I burn and eat that half back in order to fuel my workouts but not sabotage my diet. Also, I’m going to just eat a 30/30/20 ratio – 30% carbs, 30% protein & 20% fat. That’s approximately 85 grams of carbs & protein and 25 grams of fat a day.

I feel really positive about the choices, I just hope I’m not let down again. I’m sick of fighting this fight and feeling like I’ll never see and end. I’m okay with maintaining a healthy lifestyle, I just want to feel like it’s to keep rather than to lose.

I’m emerging, slowly but surely.

Its official: I’m an allergy sufferer.

This year in particular has been eye opening as we’ve had such a nice wet year (quick fact: California has declared the drought over!) that has resulted in lots of blooming, thriving plant life… that has been killing me.

I finally went to the doctors two weeks ago and begged for some relief. I was happy to know that I had a lot of options and so I was prescribed Allegra D, some eye drops, and told to take Benadryl at night for 3-5 nights to dry everything up. Well the Allegra D is keeping the allergies under control but I haven’t completely dried up so I had to go back. Now I’m taking some “awesome” nasal spray – and if that doesn’t dry it up then it’s a steroid and some antibiotics. The only reason I went back a second time is because I’m still unable to hear well out of my left year and my cough & sore throat hasn’t gone away – apparently all linked to dripping sinuses, yuck.

The coughing has made working out – strenuously – difficult. I can do yoga, but I can’t do the bootcamp at work as I start to huff & puff and then cough & cough and can’t catch my breath. I’ve already missed two sessions (out of five) and I just hope that I can make it to tomorrow & Friday. I’m down less than five pounds since I’ve REALLY started dieting and that’s disappointing – and surprising. I’ve removed SO much crap and salt from my diet I thought for sure I’d show better loss than five pounds. Just got to keep trying…

Take the good with the bad.

Ate terribly this weekend (due to being away from home), but I’m starting fresh today!

I went to Winco before work and they had Odwalla bars for sale so I stocked up due to the fact that my recent derailments at work have been a result of not having any healthier options. Worked out great today as I forgot to bring a second snack, the Superfood bar was amazing and at a reasonable 200 calories I feel it was a true snack and not some knock off *cough cough*100 calorie snack packs *cough cough*

I don’t think I posted about it, but I went to my first yoga session last Wednesday! While it didn’t blow my socks off, the idea of going back is exciting. I don’t quite know what I was expecting, but it didn’t meet my expectations. Its held at a dance studio, with a tap dance class next door, so the atmosphere isn’t exactly calming and refreshing. Plus, the instructor turned on a mix of music that included Sublime once the class got going. As much as I hate to admit it, I think I really was hoping for the soft wind pipe music or ocean waves. But, it was enjoyable all the same and I figure, beggars cant be choosers. Maybe once I’m more comfortable with the idea of doing yoga, I’ll have my own sessions on the back patio.

I ended up being able to sign up for the bootcamp at work! The class was filled by noon, so apparently the demand is still there (the class is limited to 30). I’m really excited for it to start on April 4th and I think in conjunction with yoga I’ll have a lot of positive results. After signing up for yoga I was reading about the fact that there are a lot of great benefits to yoga – but on an average, weight loss is not one of them. Really opened my eyes to the fact that I can’t take the easy way out (two hours of yoga a week) over the right way (serious cardio 3+ a week). But I’m hoping that yoga will help me accomplish my goal of squatting by the time I get pregnant with my second child. Considering I really want to do a midwife birth in my home with my second child, squatting is desirable.

Anyhow, check out the cute clutch I bought at the aquarium over the weekend – its the perfect travel gear as it holds my cards & phone, has a strap AND a belt loop in the back – plus it looks cute

Its a new week!

Last week was a wash, in my opinion, in regards to eating well. I was eating well during the day, however I wasn’t eating well at night. I need to come up with a Plan B when it comes to dinner, because depending solely on my father’s choice of meals didn’t work last week. Sure, he didn’t cook anything drastically terrible – but it was a change of mindset for me that derailed me for the rest of the evening. Basically, if I couldn’t track it – I didn’t care for the rest of the night and I finished off the evening with Dryer’s Ice Cream.

But it’s a new week! I’m not going to stress about this whole process, and getting results, until I feel I’ve exhausted all my efforts – which I have not.

I’m trying a new recipe today, on suggestion of MT – a black bean, corn & quinoa mix that I found on Spark Recipes. I was a little hesitant to try it because if you point* out the nutritional value it equates to 5 points. That’s a lot to me. However, I’m going to try it and see how it factors into the rest of my diet before deciding. As of now, with all my meals planned besides dinner, I’m still within my calorie range and my balanced percentages. However, I’m really close to going overboard on my carbohydrates – I’m at 63% when my max should be 65%.

I’m continuing with my blueberry & banana smoothies in the morning, ham wrap for lunch and orange & shrimp salad in the afternoon – as I’m still really enjoying those flavors and I’ve gotten the prep down to a science. I really like trying new things, but it takes time to learn the recipes and how I’m going to pack and store the servings.

*Weight Watchers Points+ system that gives easy to track points to each food or meal. Nutritional values it takes into account are fat, protein, carbohydrates & fiber.

I <3 Fresh & Easy

I haven’t been doing very good on my diet, and it’s both a good thing and a bad to see I haven’t gained any weight because of it. I just have to keep trying.

In that spirit, we went to Fresh & Easy last night to do our weekly shopping and I changed it up a bit. I usually would buy only produce since I was being supplied with my main meals through NutriSystem, but I’m both tired of their meals and slowly running out of them.

I added sandwich meat and whole wheat sandwich thins (these are a great alternative to sliced bread. I find that two slices of whole wheat bread to be too much bread and these are amazingly filling without making you feel like you’re going to burst plus they are lower in calories) to my shopping cart, and this morning I assembled a good healthy sandwich which included low-calorie sandwich meat, two full leaves of romaine lettuce, two slices of tomatoes and some honey mustard. All in all, it should be about 260 calories and it looks really filling.

I also found that they had fresh broccoli & butternut squash pre-washed and chopped in steamer bags. I cooked the broccoli this morning and it’s amazing in comparison to frozen and it was easy too. I don’t think I’ve ever had butternut squash and I’m excited to try it

I found that the bushel of asparagus I had in the refrigerator was still good so last night we tried, for the first time, oven-roasted asparagus sprinkled with light olive oil, garlic salt & pepper. It was amazing! Very simple too. I even offered some to the baby and she seemed to enjoy it.

Tonight I’m going to eat some turkey chilli I also found at Fresh & Easy – more than 11 ounces is only 200 calories and a ton of protein and fiber. What a “super” dish! I only bought one, to try it out in case it’s over flavored (such a thing, since I’m picky) but if it’s good I’m going to get more.

Anyhow, like I said – I just have to keep trying. I’ve got six months before my self-imposed deadline and I’d really like to reach it.

Much to catch up on.

Its been awhile since I last posted, so I’ve got a bit to catch up on.

First, I’ve stopped ordering NutriSystem as I found it was just TOO expensive. Plus as much as I was enjoying SOME dishes, most I was not. I came to the realization that it was time to stop ordering from them when I opened a “double chocolate muffin” and was assaulted by the aroma of lighter fluid. Sometimes my nose is just wonky though, so I ate it anyhow and had a terrible taste in my mouth all day. I had more than one, so I tried a second one just to clarify that it wasn’t just a fluke and I was sad to see it wasn’t.

On that note, while I’ve still been weighing myself and trying to eat right – I failed last week. This is a new week though, so I’m not going to give up entirely. Since I started my plan I’ve lost a total of 6 pounds – which I’m going to be thankful for even if it’s not as great as I was hoping.

I’ve finished A Spot of Bother, which I’ll post about later. A great surprise for a book club selection

The last two weeks at work have been spent on writing my yearly self-evaluation. This year I’m trying VERY hard to get promoted and so I’m not only trying to display that through my written self-evaluation but also through my newly learned hardware skills. I’m trying hard to make time to study books and perform labs and it’s difficult. The positive thing is, even if I don’t pass the test they’re creating for me doesn’t mean I have to wait a year to take that test again. I can try in one month or three months. “Flexing”, as they call it at my work when you move up in your position without changing classification, will ensure a bigger paycheck – plus it’ll boost my confidence at work. My self-esteem is still low, thanks to field guys who come in, take one look at me, and call me my co-worker’s “secretary”.

We haven’t heard from our PM in regards to our home owner wanting money for the water heater fiasco, so that’s good. Our air conditioner sucks though – and while I’ve been told it’s going to be serviced – I’m not holding my breath.

Last Thursday I got a facial, part 1 or 3 of a Mother’s Day package Paul bought me. I had some kind of Retinol treatment, and while I didn’t feel anything the day I got it done (or when I washed my face that night with Cetaphil) I certainly felt something Saturday morning after getting out of the shower. My skin felt tight and itchy, almost as though I were sun burnt. I’ve felt like that all weekend, despite gentle cleansers and moisturizers. Plus, my skin has been flaking slightly. No fun, I’m really self-conscious of it. My next visit isn’t until mid-July – and it’s a microderm abrasion treatment, I just hope my skin fairs better!

We got a new camera! I’m going to dedicate a whole post to it though, so keep an eye out!

Keep my head up.

This past week, I only lost one pound. It’s better than nothing – and MUCH better than having gained – but I’m still unhappy with it.  I can only blame myself, as I slipped a lot this past week in little ways thinking that it wasn’t that big of a deal. Well this is my wake up call, right now it’s ALL a big deal. I just need to stick to my NS plan for now – no veering off the path. I have to stay committed and focused!

Today’s a new day – and the start of a new week. I’m resetting. I’m refreshing. I’m realigning myself with my goals.

I can do this.

Week 2: Finished.

Another week gone
Another weigh-in completed
Another 2 pounds lost
Another 2 pounds DEFEATED.

I’m right on track!

Last week was a bit of a “cheater” week – in the terms that I did not stick 100% to the NS diet – but I still stayed within my calorie goals. Monday I had a slice of pizza, Wednesday I had some Hawaiian BBQ, Sunday I had breakfast with my mom & sister and lunch at the mall. Through all of this I kept an eye on how much I was eating, how full I was feeling, and what my limits were. Considering I still lost 2 pounds, I consider it a success.

This week, I don’t think I’ll be doing as much cheating – if any. I’m really molding my life around my eating habits, and I like that. I like knowing what I’m going to be eating and when. I like “scheduling” meals to ensure that I make time for prep and enjoyment.

I didn’t use the elliptical machine once last week – and I have to admit I didn’t really “try”. I wanted to start waking up early, and I asked Paul to help me because he seemed so much more motivated, but it never happened. At this point, where I’m still losing an acceptable amount of weight, I’m not going to worry about it. Once I hit my plateau I’ll be more inclined – I know it.

One thing I DID do last week is burn at least 250 calories a day with walking. I’m really proud of that because, while it’s just 30-45 minutes a day, it took a lot of commitment for me. What helped was my audiobook! I was able to keep reading my book, like I used to during lunch, and exercise